Just like that first cigarette, or that first sip, one stroke of the dick can be addicting.
We are living in a society where not only are objects disposable, but people are as well. With social media and dating sites becoming ever prevalent, the sea of faces soon become indistinguishable, leading to the idea that no one is special, and everyone is replaceable.
Sometimes we give up on relationships way too soon. At the first sign of someone not meeting our laundry list of expectations, or that moment when one of their personality flaws first reveals itself, we call it quits. I'm not saying that we have to stay with someone whom you know for sure you aren't compatible with, but when first getting to know someone, give them a chance.
Some of us have built up such a low-tolerance for bullshit due to our past relationships and casual encounters that we don't allow time for explanation and redemption, leading into a closet full of old, wrinkled, potential relationships that if they had been taken care of, with the wrinkles ironed out, may have led to the love of our lives.
So are you addicted to dating, and if so what are some of the signs:
ALWAYS A FIRST, NEVER A SECOND
If you are the type of person who is continuously going on first dates that rarely lead to second ones, you may have an addiction to dating. Often times we formulate our opinions of a person based on first impression, but this usually isn't a good idea. Some people are shy, or they may be a private person who needs to feel comfortable enough to come out of their shell and showcase who they really are. On a second date, they may feel confident enough in their position with you, to where you get to experience the awesome person they really are.
YOU HAVE A VERY STRICT IDEAL
There is nothing wrong with having standards when it comes to dating, and if you don't have any that may be one of your problems. But we shouldn't be so stringent that if a guy fails to meet one of our most diminutive standards, we vow to never see them again because of that.
Some of our standards are plain outrageous. He has to be a certain height, his shoes must be on point, he has to have tattoos, his penis must be a certain length and thickness, his bank account has to read a specific number, can't be bald, he has to have a video vixen's body, yet he can't show any signs of femininity, and the list of ridiculousness goes on.
When we are so specific on our ideal, we alienate a lot of men who could be right for us.
CONSTANTLY ON THE PROWL
Are you one of those people can't go a day or even a couple of hours without checking your online profile? Do you always feel as though if you aren't logged in at all times, you may miss someone--or they may miss you? If so, you may have a dating addiction.
So what steps can be taken to cure your dating addiction:
GIVE HIM A CHANCE
Unless someone is rude, annoying as all hell, or the thought of them completely repulses you, if the opportunity comes around for a second date, take it. Use this as a chance to get to know them better. Maybe they didn't give you the best impression on the first date, due to nerves or whatever the case may have been, but on the second you might be able to see more of them.
Some men try way too hard on the first meeting and end up messing up the mood, so if the attraction is still there, take the offer for another date, and then make your final decision on whether or not you'd like to continue seeing them.
DON'T JUDGE OFF OF ONLINE PHOTOS
In the past I have been guilty of it, and I'm sure some of you gentlemen have as well. When someone would inbox me on Adam4Adam, BGC, and some other random dating sites; before reading their message--I would check out their profile photos, and if they didn't meet the physical test 100%, their email was deleted.
Over time I realized that I was being too critical on the physical, and began noticing that a lot of these men had extraordinary profiles, and what they were looking for coincided with me. Some people just aren't photogenic, so if the dialogue in the profile is good, respond, give them a chance and agree to a date. Maybe you'll find a connection with this person, and once you meet the small physical flaws that you may see, might not be such a huge problem. If he doesn't have that eight pack set of abs, so what he makes you laugh until yours ache. He's a little bit shorter than what you usually date? Who cares his personality adds a couple inches to his height. He doesn't have Trump money? That's fine, he's supporting himself, not taking away from your coins, and he's rich in morals, and substance. Real love is not superficial, and nether should we be when choosing a potential partner.
DON'T MAKE DATING A JOB
Trust me when I tell you that I've been there, turning something that is supposed to be fun, and spontaneous into a full-time job.
When it comes to online dating sites, monitor the amount of time you spend on them. Don't let precious time that could be used elsewhere, be spent searching through hundreds of profiles when there is plenty of life to be lived offline.
Schedule a certain amount of time each day that you will go online, check your messages, respond, email guys who spark your interest, and once that time is up, log off. Ideally 10-20 minutes is enough time to complete all of these tasks, and if you and someone are engaging in a conversation, send your final reply and within it let them know that you are signing off, as to express your interest; not abruptly signing off in mid-convo and coming off as rude or uninterested.
SUSPEND YOUR PROFILE
After the third successful date, your profile should no longer show up in search results, because it should be deleted. The excuse that your chats online are with friends is dangerous since majority of the men online are single, looking for hookups, or are in open relationships. There are plenty of other non-dating social networking sites where you can meet new friends and keep in contact with old ones, where there aren't any nude photos in their profiles.
Through it all it is important to remember that dating should be fun, don't take it so seriously to where you drive yourself insane. If a man isn't your type, enjoy the venue of the date, and try to convert things to a friendship level. And once you’ve began dating someone, have a serious conversation setting the terms and conditions of your budding relationship, whether dating profiles should be deleted, or modified to let others know that you are committed, and serious about staying that way.